Τρίτη, 18 Δεκεμβρίου 2012

Is it Christmas yet?

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Well, it doesn't feel like Christmas around here at all. 
No decorations, no plans, no Christmas spirit or whatever...

Things here have been really strange these days. I struggle to find what I want to do and who I want to be. I was expecting for some changes to come but something completely different happened. I'm not sure if I want to talk about it here. At least, not yet.

All there is in my mind (and life) is chaos. About Christmas too. See, I don't know how to feel about Christmas. I don't know if I really wanna do anything about it. I'm not a religious person so isn't it hypocritical to celebrate? I also hate the fact that everyone suddenly becomes a ''good'' person and acts kindly because...you know, it's Christmas! A few days later he'll become an asshole again. And don't get me started about consumerism.

On the other hand, I want to teach my son to celebrate everything in his life. And of course I don't want him to feel miserable. I remember last Christmas, my first Christmas as a mother, I was so excited and I wanted to make my baby feel this experience. Last year was different of course. I had my home and it was the new start in my life.

I have to make a desicion about Christmas. Do I want to celebrate it? And if yes, what are the traditions I want to keep and what are the ones I don't? 

I know I want to do something for my kiddo. But I want to do something really nice and thoughtfull instead of buying a bunch of plastic toys for him. I don't get out a lot lately. I don't get out at all actually. But the other day, I was going to buy some food with Nereus and he noticed some houses decorated with Christmas lights. He was fascinated! I have to do something for him. Something with lights.

Any ideas?

2 σχόλια:

  1. Krysta, I hope everything is ok with you and you family.

    This year's xmas has been stressing me out as well. With all of the life changes we have been through, I wanted xams to be different this year as well. I wanted it to be a xmas of giving, donating, volunteering. But I am the one in my family who has these wants. The hubby for some reasons forgot everything we have talked about and has regressed back to thinking we need to buy for our family members. this is especially difficult because we are living on the tightest budget we ever have. I am trying to make all of the gifts we will give.

    I despise consumerism as well! I did get a few things for Amar'e all second hand though. I got her all wooden toys and donated all of her plastic! I agree with you that people are nice for this time a year, and turn back to assholes again soon after it is over.

    Follow your heart and feelings. If you dont feel the need to celebrate, dont. Maybe do a web search for meaningful xmas traditions? I feel as lost as you my dear! xoxo ♥♥♥

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  2. Thanks for the support dear! I'll work it out I guess...

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